This is the first time I'm doing something like this and I guess I have some reservations. Putting my thoughts out on the internet like this...it seems sort of invasive. And I don't have much of interest to say. But, since I managed to graduate early and am leaving campus, my friends thought it would be a good idea. Like somehow, I'll be doing interesting things when I get to university and they want to know. Don't expect much.

I guess that's all I have to say. Graduating early. Leaving Astraea soon. I guess I'll miss this place, but I'm still sort of glad to get away.

-Aika
愛歌

My brother and his fiancee just got married. I hear she used to be a student here. I think she was in Lulim or something. I should know this, shouldn't I? I never saw her on campus or anything, but I heard a little about her. She apparently worked here for a little while, too. She did something with students with disabilities, I think. I heard she was in love with another former Astraea student, someone from Spica. They even lived together for a while. When her parents found out, they forced her back home and put a rush on the wedding. But that's just what I've heard.

She doesn't seem like a very happy person and doesn't talk to anyone much. So I don't know if any of that stuff is true. If it is, it seems sort of sad. I'm mixed, of course. If she's in love with someone else, she should be able to be with that person. But I know my brother cares a lot about her. He says she hardly even talks to him. I wonder about the real story. The wedding was very nice, though. For some reason, I feel like she didn't look very happy. But what do I know? My experiences with this stuff haven't ended well. So what right do I have to say anything?

-Aika
愛歌

I haven't said much this summer. I guess I haven't really been doing too much. Just getting ready for school and all that. I heard from my brother that his wife is pregnant. I saw her, too. She's happier than I've ever seen her before. I guess having a baby can do that to someone? I don't really know. It's not an experience I particularly want for myself. She's talking quite a bit more, though. Even to me, but I still didn't get much of a chance to talk with her recently.

Oh, by the way, I'm in college now. It's pretty weird and sort of stressful being so far from home and not knowing anyone. My roommate seems pretty nice. Her name is Tomoka and she already wants me to just call her Tomo. I hope I can be friends with her. I haven't had a roommate in a while, so I forgot how hard it is to hide the stuffed animals and pictures of cute clothes that I took from magazines. I hope she doesn't find out.

-Aika
愛歌

A lot has happened since I've last written. Sometimes I wonder what's the point of writing? Does anyone even bother to look at this? It makes me unwilling to write. Some of my Astraea friends said they read, so I guess that's reason enough to keep going. It's already winter. It's hard to believe how much time has past since I've left Astraea.

My brother's wife had a baby. She looks just like him. She's so cute and precious! I can't get over how adorable she is. Does that mean that I just called my brother cute? Daiyu's - his wife's - good mood during the pregnancy completely went away. Hormones, maybe? I've heard that some people get depressed afterwards. I don't really know how it works, and I don't care much to find out.

I've been spending a lot of time with Tomo. She already knows what she wants to do with her life. She wants to be a fashion photographer. It's strange to see how she has it all planned and how she has this thing that she's so passionate about. I still don't know what to do. But she's so cheerful and energetic that it's infectious. And she's small, too. It's pretty darn cute. I hope she doesn't read this, because I don't think she'd appreciate being called that. Speaking of cute things, I'm lucky that she still hasn't found my collections.

Oh, but she says that she wants to use me for some of her projects this semester. I'm a little worried about what that means, but I guess I'll try it if she asks. I hope she forgets, since I've never been particularly fond of having my picture taken.

Maybe Tomo's rubbing off on me a little. I've been talking to people more. It feels easier to meet people here. I wonder if it's because everyone else is new and confused, too. I've been making friends here. Of course, that doesn't mean I'll forget the people I've met at Astraea. I don't think I can ever forget the things that happened there. But I like making friends here, too. It's like starting over and having a second chance. I'm pretty sure I'm messing it up, but having Tomo around to help me meet people is helping. A guy named Hiroki lives in a dorm near ours. He's been asking to hang out together a lot. Tomo giggles every time he's with us. She's a strange girl.

Hiroki, though, is a lot of fun. I don't need a lot of friends. I've always said that, but it looks like right now, I have two good friends to help me get through college.

-Aika
愛歌

School's been busier than I expected, so I haven't written a lot. I just looked back and noticed that the last thing I wrote was when Daiyu, my brother's wife, had her baby. She's been getting so big, but the mother doesn't seem too happy still. Is that what happens? Pregnancy seems less and less appealing.

Oh yeah, and I've been spending a lot of time with Hiroki lately. He said he likes that I'm cool and mysterious. Obviously, no one's found out my secret. It's been hard hiding it all this year, especially as I've been talking to people more and more. Tomo seems suspicious, but I don't think she's noticed anything yet.

I think I really like Hiroki. I've been having a lot of fun with him and he's pretty nice. He suggested that I might look good if I dye my hair, and since he said he likes the cool look on me, I've decided to do it. And I took it a step farther. Tomo took pictures, so I'll put some of them up soon. I'm not as embarrassed of the way I look anymore. I mean, I'm still embarrassed, but Hiroki says the new look suits me so I guess it's better than before.

Oh yeah, I mentioned that Tomo took pictures. She's been asking me to help her with a lot of her projects at school. At first it was embarrassing, and it still sort of is, but I'm getting used to it and sometimes it can be pretty fun. Ah! I'm running late for class! I don't want to be late, the group members that I'm working with are so cute and fun. I'll put up that picture another time.

-Aika
愛歌

It's been a while. I've been ignoring this place - this blog and this school - for so long. I never thought I would be back here, to either of these places. A lot has changed. But here I am and I brought my cute little cat with me. I think this will be a good home for her and I hope she'll like it here.

-Aika
愛歌